Identifying resources and skills is a key step in conducting a coaching interview, especially with LGBTQ+ people. The aim is to help the person become aware of their strengths, their talents, and their achievements, in order to mobilize them towards their goal. This is a powerful lever of self-confidence and motivation, essential for people who have often doubted their worth due to their difference.
Resources are all the positive elements on which the person can lean on to move forward: their personal qualities, knowledge and skills, their support network, their experiences of success, their values, their dreams… They can be internal (self-confidence, creativity, determination…) or external (friends, family, organizations, inspiring models…). The challenge is to help the person identify and value this often underestimated capital.
Let’s take the example of a transgender person wishing to come out at work. By exploring their resources, they can become aware of their ability to assert themselves, demonstrated during their transition journey. They may realize that they have supportive colleagues around them, an LGBT organization ready to support them. They can recall a past experience where they succeeded in overcoming their fear to stand up for their beliefs. All these elements are support points to dare to take the step.
Skills are the know-how and interpersonal skills that the person has developed over their journey, often without being fully aware of it. For LGBTQ+ people who have had to face many challenges, these skills are often very rich: the ability to face adversity, to question themselves, to adapt to change, to create bonds in difference, to defend their rights… Highlighting these unique talents is a tremendous boost to self-confidence.
Let’s imagine a lesbian person who is hesitant to get involved in an activist organization. By exploring her skills, she may realize that she has a great sense of listening and empathy, developed during her coming-out with her loved ones. She may become aware of her creativity and organizational skills, demonstrated in her professional projects. She can remember her ability to speak in public, revealed during testimonials about her journey. All assets to dare to embark on the associative adventure!
In practical terms, the coach has several tools to help the person identify their resources and skills:
– Questioning: “In what situations did you especially feel proud of yourself?“, “What qualities do your loved ones recognize in you?“, “What challenges have you overcome in your life?”
– Positive reformulation: “What I hear is that you have a great ability to question yourself“, “Your journey shows a nice perseverance in the face of obstacles“.
– Image feedback: “When you tell this experience, I see you as a very creative and audacious person“, “I am impressed by your courage to affirm who you are“.
– Visualization: “Imagine that you have succeeded in your coming-out with your family. What qualities have you mobilized to get there?“, “Project yourself in 5 years, living a life that looks like you. What skills have you developed to get there?”
The objective is to bring out a positive image of oneself, in contrast to the doubts and internalized criticism. This is a real work of renarcissization, particularly important for LGBTQ+ people who have often been hurt in their self-esteem. By reconnecting with their resources, they can reclaim their worth and their legitimacy to be who they are.
This identification work is not done in a day, it is a gradual process. The coach must revisit it regularly, inviting the person to be attentive to the small daily successes, to the positive feedback from their surroundings, to moments of pride and joy. He or she may suggest keeping a success journal, to anchor these realizations over time.
It is important not to fall into the pitfall of naive positive thinking, which would deny the very real difficulties. Recognizing one’s resources does not mean that everything becomes easy, but that one has within oneself resources to cope. The coach must ensure to maintain a balance between support and challenge, to help the person grow.
Identifying resources and skills is also an opportunity to open new perspectives. By becoming aware of their assets, the person may consider projects they would never have dared before. A gay man realizing his ability to create connections may embark on a career as a mediator. A non-binary person discovering their talent for writing may dream of becoming an author. Resources are springboards to a greater future.
For LGBTQ+ people, this work takes on a particular dimension. It is an opportunity to transmute wounds into strengths, to make difference a wealth. By realizing the unique skills developed in their journey, they can put them to the service of their fulfillment and that of others. They then become inspiring models for their community.
The coach is a precious benevolent mirror in this quest. Through his positive and valuing gaze, he helps the person to change the way they look at themselves. He is the witness to the resources that awaken, the companion of victories over doubts. More than an expert, he is a revealer of talents, at the service of the person’s future.
Of course, this work does not exempt from a necessary lucid look at the areas of improvement. Recognizing one’s assets does not dispense with continuing to grow, to develop new skills. But it is from this foundation of self-confidence that one can move serenely on the path of development.
In summary, identifying resources and skills is an essential milestone in the coaching of LGBTQ+ people. By helping them to recognize their often ignored or minimized strengths, the coach lays the foundations for a solid self-esteem. It opens the way to a more fulfilling and creative life, where difference becomes an asset. For people who have long been marginalized, this is an inspiring message of hope and possibilities. By revealing the gems in each one, the coach becomes a precious ally on the path to self-pride.
Key takeaways:
– Identifying resources and skills is a key step in coaching, particularly important for LGBTQ+ people who have often doubted their worth.
– Resources are all the positive elements that the person can lean on: qualities, knowledge, network, experiences of success… They can be internal or external.
– Skills are the know-how and interpersonal skills developed over the journey, often without being fully aware of it. LGBTQ+ people often have unique skills related to their experiences.
– The coach has several tools to help identify resources and skills: questioning, positive reformulation, image feedback, visualization…
– The goal is to bring forth a positive self-image, in contrast to internalized doubts. This is an essential work of renarcissization.
– This work also opens up new perspectives by revealing ignored assets. The difference can become a wealth serving one’s fulfillment.
– The coach is a benevolent mirror who, through their positive gaze, helps change the light in which one views oneself. They are a talent revealer.
– Well implemented, this realization of resources lays the foundation of solid self-confidence, a necessary foundation to move forward serenely.
– Identifying resources and skills is a cornerstone in the coaching of LGBTQ+ people. It is a solid basis for self-esteem and opens the door for growth, self-discovery, and embodies a powerful message of hope and possibilities.
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