Powerful questioning and rephrasing are two critical techniques in the art of mentoring and coaching. They help guide your client to deepen their thought process, clarify their thinking, and find their own solutions.
Powerful questioning is the practice of asking open-ended, relevant, and stimulating questions that encourage exploration rather than seeking a precise answer. It’s not an interrogation, but an invitation to delve deeper into understanding oneself and their situation. Powerful questions often begin with “How,” “What,” “In what way,” “What would happen if”. They open up a field of possibilities and provoke creative thinking.
Here are a few examples of powerful questions:
– “How are you experiencing this situation currently?”
– “What is truly important to you in this project?”
– “In what way can this difficulty be a learning opportunity?”
– “What would happen if you dare to say no?”
– “What is your intuition telling you about this choice?”
By asking these questions, you invite your client to connect with their feelings, their values, their resources. You help them take a step back, consider new perspectives, identify their obstacles and their levers. Your questions are like doors opening towards a better understanding of oneself and their options.
Rephrasing is the art of repeating in your own words what your client has just expressed. It’s a way to show them that you have listened carefully and to verify that you have understood the significance and the stakes of their statement. By rephrasing, you also offer a mirror that can help them realize aspects they may not have perceived.
There are different types of rephrasing:
– The echo rephrase involves repeating the last words spoken to restart the expression. “You say that this situation is unfair…”
– The summary rephrase summarizes the critical points discussed. “If I understand correctly, on one hand, you aspire to greater independence, and on the other, you fear disappointing those around you. Is that right?”
– The clarifying rephrase aims to specify a point. “When you say you feel overwhelmed, can you tell me more?”
– The reflective rephrase highlights an emotion. “I hear a lot of anger in your words; is this the emotion you’re feeling?”
By regularly rephrasing your client’s words, you establish a climate of trust and mutual understanding. You help them put precise words to their experience and structure their thinking. You allow them to hear themselves say things and integrate their realizations.
Powerful questioning and rephrasing are invaluable allies to encourage your client’s expression and progression. When used accurately and sympathetically, they enable the client to utilize their internal resources and find within themselves the answers to their inquiries. Your role is to create the conditions for this process of exploration and resolution to occur, respecting the pace and needs of your client.
Practicing questioning and rephrasing requires presence, flexibility, and training. Initially, you can prepare key questions ahead of your sessions and practice mentally rephrasing the statements of your counterparts. Gradually, you will develop your ability to seize opportunities for deepening and clarification on the spot. You will progressively find your own style, staying open to your intuition and the reactions of your client.
Do not hesitate to experiment with different wordings and observe their effects. Pay attention to the verbal and non-verbal signs that indicate a hit: a brightening gaze, an “exactly!”, a silence filled with emotion, a freed breath… These feedbacks will encourage you to deepen your practice and refine your art of questioning and rephrasing for the benefit of your clients’ blossoming.
Key takeaways:
– Powerful questioning and rephrasing are two critical techniques in the art of mentoring and coaching.
– Powerful questioning involves asking open-ended, relevant, and stimulating questions that encourage exploration and thinking. Powerful questions often start with “How,” “What,” “In what way,” “What would happen if”.
– Rephrasing is the art of repeating in one’s own words what the client has expressed. It demonstrates attentive listening, checks for understanding, and provides a mirror for realizing certain aspects.
– There are different types of rephrasing: echo, summary, clarification, and reflection.
– Powerful questioning and rephrasing establish a climate of trust, help put precise words to the client’s experience, and structure their thinking. They facilitate the client’s expression, progression, and mobilization of internal resources.
– Practicing these techniques requires presence, flexibility, and training. It is crucial to find one’s style, experiment with different wordings, and be attentive to the client’s reactions.
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